Separation Anxiety in Pets – Why It Happens & What You Can Do
When pets panic the moment you grab your keys or head to the door, it’s not a quirky habit — it’s a distress call. Separation anxiety is real, and it can be just as overwhelming for the owner as it is for the animal.
In this guide, we’ll break down what’s actually going on, which animals are most prone, and practical, pet-friendly ways to help ease their stress.
Here’s what we’re covering:
- What separation anxiety is and why it happens
- Common symptoms to look out for
- Which pets are most affected (and why)
- What you can do to help: training, routine tweaks, enrichment, and natural support
Let’s get into it.

What Is Separation Anxiety in Pets?
Separation anxiety is when a pet becomes distressed due to being left alone or separated from their main person. It’s not always about being alone — it’s about being without you.
This isn’t just whining at the door — for some animals, it’s full-blown panic. Think pacing, barking, destroying things, or worse. It’s not misbehaviour — it’s fear.
Why Does It Happen?
Separation anxiety usually stems from one of three things:
-
Over-attachment:
The pet relies too heavily on one person for comfort, direction, and stimulation. -
Sudden change in routine:
A change in your schedule (e.g., going back to work after being home more) can trigger it. -
Trauma or past experiences:
Pets who’ve been rehomed, lost, or left alone for long periods are more likely to develop anxiety.
Bonus reason? Some pets are just wired a little more anxiously — and that’s okay.

Signs Your Pet Might Have Separation Anxiety
Some are obvious, others sneak under the radar. Look out for:
- Barking, howling, or crying when left alone
- Destructive chewing or digging (especially near doors or windows)
- Soiling inside (when usually toilet trained)
- Pacing or restlessness
- Excessive drooling
- Trying to escape
- Loss of appetite
- Depression or lethargy when you’re not around
Even pets that seem okay might be struggling quietly — cats may withdraw or stop grooming, birds may pluck their feathers, and small animals can become more reclusive.
Which Pets Are Most Affected?
It’s not just dogs!
- Dogs 🐕 – especially working breeds, Velcro dogs, rescues, or pups raised during COVID lockdowns.
- Cats 🐈 – particularly those closely bonded to one person or who aren’t used to change.
- Birds 🐦 – parrots and cockatoos are social, intelligent creatures that can suffer deeply from isolation.
- Guinea pigs & rabbits 🐰 – these prey animals thrive on routine and the presence of others (including humans!).
- Fish 🐟 – less prone to emotional attachment, but sudden environmental change or erratic tank cleaning schedules can stress them.

How You Can Help – Simple Steps That Make a Big Difference
1. Train for Calm Departures & Returns
- Skip the big goodbye scenes. A simple "See you soon" is better than a dramatic farewell.
- When you return, wait until your pet is calm before giving attention.
- Leave for short periods at first and gradually build up time away.
2. Create a Predictable Routine
- Feeding, walks, playtime — keep it consistent.
- Predictability helps pets feel secure.
3. Keep Them Busy While You're Away
- Dogs: Puzzle feeders, chew toys, calming music
- Cats: Window perches, interactive toys
- Birds: Foraging toys, audio stimulation
- Guinea pigs/rabbits: Tunnels, hay stuffers, safe toys
- Fish: A well-structured tank with hiding spots, consistent lighting/timer
4. Create a Safe Space
- A quiet, comfy area they associate with calm (not punishment)
- Consider using a pheromone diffuser or calming spray here
5. Try Natural Supports
- Rescue Remedy or calming sprays for dogs, cats, and birds
- Herbal chews or infusions (check for species-safe options!)
- A few drops of pet-safe essential oils on a blanket (lavender is great — but not for cats!)
6. Training & Desensitisation
- Practise grabbing your keys or putting on shoes without leaving, so those triggers lose meaning
- Use positive reinforcement to reward calm behaviour
7. Enlist Help if Needed
- A dog walker, pet sitter, or trusted neighbour can break up long days
- If it’s severe, consider a qualified animal behaviourist

Final Thoughts
Your pet isn’t trying to guilt-trip you — they’re just struggling. And with the right steps, you can help them learn that being alone doesn’t mean being abandoned.
Remember: it takes time, patience, and consistency. But the payoff? A calmer, happier pet — and a guilt-free goodbye when you head out the door.
Stay kind,
Majella 🐾
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